Crows are really smart. A guy taught one to find coins and deposit them into a machine, which would dispense a peanut.
When I breed a murder of crows that steal electronics (iPhones, digital cameras and PDAs) I’m going to get really rich, and it will only cost me peanuts and maybe a decade. Want to invest?
http://www.kevinnalts.com
SCRIPT: Crows are a nuisance, right? They root through garbage, and caw us from our slumber. But what if I could train the species- which top the avian IQ scale - to be my minions? I’d be rich, and you’ll see why.
You see recently while digging up an old brick path, I noticed that crows were hanging around my brick pile to gather the worms I made homeless.
Then I read in a recent O Magazine (look- Oprah with puppies) about a hacker named Joshua Klein who spent a decade studying crows, and discovered they’re highly intelligent and adept at making the human environment work in their favor. In Japan the black corvids drop tough nuts into traffic so cars crush them, then the genus wait for pedestrian lights to retrieve them.
Get this- Klein invented a wooden box and taught his crow to put a coin in the chute, as it would dispense a tasty peanut.
So what, you say? You don’t get it. He hopes his feathered friend will teach a murder of crows at a nearby dump to gather and deposit coins for him- imagine them as the hacker’s minions, collecting billions lost coins.
What? Nothing is impossible. Ask Edison. No he’s dead. Ask “The Raven” poet Edgar Allen Poe. Or reference, if you will, classical mythology, when a crow told the god Apollo that his lover Coronis was cheating on him with a mortal. Pigeons couldn’t do that.
My first plan was to have my minion crows carry advertisements for Nalts shirts and DVDs. But then I remembered that the medium is the message. You’d spend like lemmings with their first Visa card if the crow looked like Caitlin Hill. But crows are sadly on the wrong side of the snake-to-puppy continuum.
So plan B is in effect. I’m going to become the Dickinseon “Fagin” of rural Pennsylvanian crows. Charity’s fine, subscribe to mine. You’ve got to pick an iPhone or two.
Crows have learned to use tools, so they’ll be easily persuaded to collect mobile phones, PDAs and digital cameras (and remember it will cost me peanuts). Then I’ll breed giant crows, capable of retrieving laptops and even bricks of cash on route to ATMs. I’ll create a costume and become EVIL CAPTAIN CROW, and I’ll be unstoppable.
Nothing is impossible.
Duration : 0:2:8
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
Your teeth are …
Your teeth are fucked!
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
wow lol
wow lol
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
……wow……
……wow……
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
Your laugh made me …
Your laugh made me giggle. XD;
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
Nalts made video …
Nalts made video about crows! <3
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
Ha the the pic of …
Ha the the pic of crow with nalts face on it was funny.
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
shave dude!
shave dude!
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
Want xbox live …
Want xbox live codes, Wii pt codes, PSN pt codes, XBL pt codes, NX codes WoW subscription codes emailed to you? OR how about an iPod, or a videogame, or ANYTHING YOU WANT!! For FREE? Visit my channel for more details!
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
you most be the …
you most be the king of youtube you rock hahahahaha
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
omg! steal iphone …
omg! steal iphone 3g S!!!
please learn me your secret so I can steal some iphones
XD
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
haha ilove you …
haha ilove you nalts(:
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
get a picture of …
get a picture of russel crowe.
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
It’s not a flock of …
It’s not a flock of crows Marge…. It’s a MURDER of crows.
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
OPRAH WITH PUPPIES …
OPRAH WITH PUPPIES !!!
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
you remind me of …
you remind me of Sylar from Heroes in this lol
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
yep. sound …
yep. sound impossible to become the EVIL KING CROW!!! wtf!? u grew a beard!! and u got glasses??!!! not bad…
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
Wow! SmileyD
Wow! SmileyD
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
You should have …
(with a crow on his shoulder)
You should have gotten a pic of Eric Draven from The Crow
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
=0 best idea ever
=0 best idea ever
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
This is gay.
This is gay.
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
wow that was …
wow that was freaking scary…
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
Looollll xD
Looollll xD
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
your spelling does.
your spelling does.
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
i want to control …
i want to control crows too XD
June 19th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
I wanna play!
I wanna play!